StElred

...Nothing quite makes a mans balls drop quicker than impending death.  Way better than that liquid courage bullshit: alcohol.  I can see it now. All it would take is faulty landing gear to scream out, "You're absolutely beautiful and I wanna go down on you!" to her. Then I'd immediately follow that with, "...and if we survive this I'd love to explore other similar options with you!"  Then as everyone proceeded into some balance between the shock over what they've just heard and the overwhelming terror of impending death, I'd start laughing hysterically, surprised that no one else making like-wise confessions. I would only hope that in this

So no shit here I am in Kuwait...FUCKING KUWAIT...using free internet access 30 minutes at a time...typing on a keyboard with most of the letters faded so you can't see them, relying on only my vast memorization of the us standard keyboard.... So i t still hasn't hit me that I'm in a "combat zone" yet.  Perhaps once I hear the first mortar hit, then it'll be apparent that I'm not home.  Because you see, Kuwait is much like Arizona really.  So yeah...this is totally awesome.....

I...don't know...what's happening to me.  I feel so scared...and I can't remember the last time I was this scared.  Bad waves of paranoia, madness, fear and loathing - intolerable vibrations in this fucking town.  I fear that this may be the end of me, this deployment.  Why am I so scared?  Am I more afraid of death than I thought?  Perhaps its the fear of dying alone.  Perhaps its dying for no reason that scares me.  I'm samurai goddammit.  I need someone to serve.  If my life was to serve one person, that I could give my life for, that I loved intensely, then perhaps it wouldn't be so bad.  At least my life would serve some purpose.  And if